Loe raamatut: «Tender Love»
“Give it time, Mark.
“You’ll soon have your life back in order,” Alice said in reassurance.
She laid a hand on his arm, and he covered it with his.
She was standing closer to Mark than she should be, Alice realized, and she tried to remove her hand and move away. But Mark held her with a firm grip.
“For the first time in months,” he said softly, “I actually believe that. When you came to us, I felt as if a burden had been lifted off my shoulders. I can’t understand it. You walk into our house, and suddenly I’m confident that all my troubles are over. Why is that, Alice?”
“I don’t know, Mark,” she whispered. “But I’m glad it’s so. Because it feels right for me to be here….”
IRENE BRAND
This prolific and popular author of both contemporary and historical inspirational fiction is a native of West Virginia, where she has lived all her life. She began writing professionally in 1977, after she completed her master’s degree in history at Marshall University. Irene taught in secondary public schools for twenty-three years, but retired in 1989 to devote herself full-time to her writing.
In 1984, after she had enjoyed a long career of publishing articles and devotional materials, her first novel was published by Thomas Nelson. Since that time, Irene has published twenty-one contemporary and historical novels and three nonfiction titles with publishers such as Zondervan, Fleming Revell and Barbour Books.
Her extensive travels with her husband, Rod, to forty-nine of the United States and thirty-two foreign countries, have inspired much of her writing. Through her writing, Irene believes she has been helpful to others, and she is grateful to the many readers who have written to say that her truly inspiring stories and compelling portrayals of characters of strong faith have made a positive impression on their lives. You can write to her at P.O. Box 2770, Southside, WV 25187.
Tender Love
Irene Brand
MILLS & BOON
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O Lord, you have searched me and you know me….
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
—Psalms 139:1, 7
Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Epilogue
Letter to Reader
Chapter One
The Tanner home stood in sharp contrast to the other dwellings along the suburban Richmond street. Other lawns were neat and the houses in good repair, but the wooden trim and the front door at the Tanners’ needed a paint job. Draperies at the picture window sagged haphazardly. The shrubbery obviously hadn’t been trimmed last season. Blooming red and white geraniums peeked forlornly over the weeds that had taken over the brick planter along the curving sidewalk.
Alice Larkin drove by the two-story brick house three times before she had the nerve to stop. Betty was right, Alice thought. This family does need help. It was amazing that a short visit to her friend in Richmond would offer an unexpected opportunity to be of service.
Alice questioned just how far she should go to help out a family in need. For a moment she was tempted to drive on, return to her well-ordered life and forget she’d ever heard about Mark Tanner and his family. Instead, she turned her van into the driveway and breathed a prayer before she turned off the ignition.
“God, I’ve never felt Your leading so strongly in any phase of my life. If it’s Your will that brought me to this point, I pray for direction because I don’t have any idea what I’m facing.”
Her friend, Betty St. Claire, director of a local nanny agency, had set up the interview for Saturday morning when all of the Tanners would be at home. When she rang the doorbell, Alice wondered which family member would answer her ring. The door was opened by a slender girl, dressed in a blue sweat outfit. The girl’s dark hair accentuated her pale skin and blue eyes.
Eight-year-old Kristin. Betty had described her as a shy, soft-spoken girl.
Kristin observed Alice with anxious eyes.
“I’m Alice Larkin. I have an appointment to see Mr. Tanner.”
The girl unlatched the storm door. “Come in,” she said softly. “He’s waiting for you.”
Kristin beckoned to Alice, and she followed the girl down a short hallway until she paused at an open door.
“The lady’s here, Daddy.”
Alice walked into the untidy office just as a man, dressed casually in jeans and a blue sweater, rose from behind a littered desk and came toward her with outstretched hand. Kristin turned quickly and entered a room adjacent to the office.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Larkin, that I wasn’t at the door to meet you,” he said and pressed her hand with a firm grip. He motioned toward the desk. “I’ve been doing book work this morning and time got away from me. I’m Mark Tanner. Please have a seat.”
Alice sat down, gladly. Betty’s brief physical description hadn’t prepared her for Mark Tanner. Betty had said he was a forty-year-old widower, but she hadn’t said that he had thick, wavy hair as black as a crow’s feathers, neatly trimmed to his nape. Nor had she mentioned that his eyes were as blue as a cloudless cerulean sky on a crisp October afternoon. Gray streaks of hair glistened above his ears, and his smooth, fair skin was marred only by a deep dimple on his right cheek. The only flaw Alice found in Mark’s appearance was that he was much too thin for such a tall man.
“Did Betty explain our family situation?” Mark asked in a deep and pleasant voice.
“Just the basics—she didn’t give me many details,” Alice said somewhat breathlessly, wishing for a few moments to recover from the shattering blow her heart had suffered. What was there about this man that affected her so strongly? If she came to work here, she couldn’t have her emotions stirred this way.
“My wife, Clarice, died six months ago, leaving me with two children. You met Kristin just now, and Eddie, my five-year-old, is a sickly child. I need someone to care for them while I work. I’ve tried two daytime nannies, but it hasn’t been satisfactory. I’m sometimes late getting home, and often the nanny would be gone several hours, leaving the children without any supervision. Although we’re crowded for space, I asked Betty to recommend a live-in nanny.”
“Don’t you have an older woman living here?”
“Yes—my wife’s grandmother, Gran Watson. Clarice was her nearest relative, and she came to live with us three years ago after she had a stroke that partially paralyzed her. The children need more supervision than she’s able to provide.”
While Mark gave a few more details about his family, Alice recalled what Betty had said about his affairs.
“Mark Tanner,” Betty had said, “has had enough trouble to ruin any man. His son was born with a congenital heart defect, that required a series of expensive operations. Over two years ago, his wife was diagnosed with uterine cancer, and she died in December after a downhill battle all the way. He’s a brilliant man and served as pastor of our church for ten years, but he resigned about a year ago because he couldn’t fulfill his obligations to the church while he looked after his children and nursed his wife. He’d built up a good retirement fund in our church organization, and when he resigned, he withdrew the capital to take care of his living expenses. By the time Clarice died, he was on the verge of financial ruin—he still owed on his son’s medical bills, Clarice’s health needs had been expensive, and when he tried to pay those bills, his other obligations fell behind. After her death, he went to work in a bank, and so far he’s kept his home, but I’ve heard he may lose it. You might be his last hope.”
“That’s preposterous. I’m not a magician. How could I make such a difference?”
“You can take care of his children and make a home for him. If he doesn’t have to worry about the daily care of his children, he can devote more time to his work.”
No wonder he looks tired, Alice thought, but she wished that Betty hadn’t placed such a guilt trip on her. If she didn’t come to work for him, and Mark lost his long fight to remain solvent, would she always blame herself? But her reaction to Mark’s magnetic personality was an immediate red flag, for she was sure a good nanny shouldn’t be personally involved with any member of the household.
“Perhaps you should tell me about yourself, Mrs. Larkin,” Mark said, with a smile that caused her heart to move in a way she hadn’t experienced before. “Where is your home? Do you live in Richmond?”
“No, I’ve lived in Alexandria since my marriage ten years ago. I’m a native Virginian—I was born in Spotsylvania County.”
He smiled again, and the dimple deepened. “I guessed that from your soft accent. How much experience have you had as a nanny?”
Alice laughed lightly. “None! Although I haven’t worked as a nanny, I’m not a novice where children are concerned. I taught for three years in a kindergarten before I married. And prior to his death, I spent several years caring for my ailing husband, so I know quite a lot about children and illness, which seem to be the qualities you need in a nanny.”
“How long have you been a widow?”
“My husband died over a year ago as the result of a rare liver ailment. I’ve thought of teaching again, but while I was here in Richmond visiting Betty, whom I’ve known since my college days, she suggested that I might enjoy being a nanny.”
Actually, Betty’s appraisal had been a bit more blunt.
“You’ll go nuts if you don’t get out of that house and start living. Even if you do have all the money you’ll ever need, you should go to work. John Larkin was a fine man, and although I still can’t imagine why you married a man so much older than you, you’ve done all you can do for him. You need a life of your own.”
“And what do you have in mind?” Alice had answered, with only a hint of pique. She had learned long ago that Betty’s blunt manner hid a heart filled with concern for others.
“I have a client who needs immediate help,” Betty said, “and I’ve checked all my applicants without finding the right person. Let me tell you about Mark Tanner,” Betty said, and her comments had spawned Alice’s interest in the Tanners.
Mark smiled encouragingly, and Alice continued, “Perhaps you should tell me what you expect from a nanny.”
“I suppose it boils down to the fact that I just need a housekeeper.” He waved his hand around the room. “The whole house is a mess, mostly because there’s no organization.” He threaded his thick hair with long, shapely fingers. “There’s no way I can work full-time, be a parent, and take care of this house and property. I’m sure the neighbors are ashamed of the lawn, although they’ve been kind enough not to say so, but I can’t afford to hire a gardener, and I don’t have the time. School closes next week for the summer, and I must have someone to supervise the children. I need so much that I hardly know where to begin. Why don’t you tell me what you’re willing to do?”
Instinctively, Alice wanted to rush to Mark, put her arms around him and tell him that she’d shoulder his whole burden. Careful, Alice! She told herself.
“Mr. Tanner, I believe it’s customary for a nanny to work five days a week and have the weekends free, which might be a satisfactory arrangement for you. Also, Betty says that you and I should agree on my workload, benefits, and salary. Right now, however, I don’t know what any of that should be.”
“I don’t mean to complain because I’ve been in tight spots before and have always managed, but right now, I’m having trouble making ends meet. However, that won’t make any difference in our financial arrangements, for the children are my major priority, and I want to provide the best care possible for them. Betty seems to think that’s you.”
Alice lowered her eyes from his warm gaze and fiddled with the purse in her lap.
“Perhaps I could come to work on a trial basis? I suggest that I come for a month at a nominal salary. I’ll take care of the cooking, housekeeping, and child care. During that time, you can see how I fit in with your family, and I can determine what needs to be done. At the end of the month, we can evaluate the situation—if you’ve found my work satisfactory and I’m contented, then we can talk about contract terms.”
“That sounds like a one-sided agreement, Mrs. Larkin—all in my favor.”
“Perhaps not,” Alice said, with her slow smile. “I may be a lousy cook, for all you know.”
The telephone rang, and Mark answered.
“Kristin, it’s for you,” he called, and Kristin tiptoed in. She took the phone and moved to a corner of the room.
“I suppose the first thing is for you to look over the house and meet the rest of the family,” Mark said.
Kristin put her hand over the mouthpiece of the phone.
“Daddy,” she said, “Susie wants to know if I can go to church camp with her next month?”
Mark’s face flushed, and he said, “What would it cost?”
“Seventy-five dollars.”
“Oh, Kristin,” Mark said, “I don’t see how you can.” He motioned to the stack of bills on his desk. “I’ve explained all of this to you. By next year, I’ll be able to provide extras like that, or perhaps you can go to another camp later on in the summer. For now, I’ll have to say no. Sorry.”
“That’s okay.” In the phone, she said, “Not this time, Susie. Maybe next year. Bye.”
“You aren’t getting a good opinion of our family,” Mark said, as he stood, and Alice thought his smile came with an effort. “Shall we tour the house?”
The downstairs consisted of the kitchen and dining area, living room, a large family room, Mark’s office, a powder room and an enclosed back porch, seemingly a repository for odds and ends. The family room with its deep chairs, bookshelves, a large table covered with magazines and children’s books, a comfortable couch, and large entertainment center was the most attractive room on the first floor.
Upstairs, were four bedrooms and two baths. Alice was introduced to Gran Watson, an eighty-year-old, who had little use of her left hip and leg. Gran’s voice had been affected by the stroke, and she spoke with a lisp through a partially paralyzed mouth.
Eddie was a scrawny five-year-old, with a colorless face and a weak voice. Dark curls covered his head, and his blue eyes were dull. His room was small, housing a set of bunk beds, a dresser, and a collection of toy automobiles. He lay on the bed watching a television cartoon, showing little interest in his potential nanny. Kristin followed Alice and Mark from room to room, listening intently to everything they said.
When they returned to Mark’s office, he said, “I’ll expect you to take my room, and I’ll move in with Eddie.”
Alice shook her head. “Not at all,” she objected, envisioning Mark’s cramped position in the narrow bunk bed. “You wouldn’t get any rest that way. Why can’t I sleep on the porch? If we move some of those cartons and use that extra bunk bed in Eddie’s room, I can manage all right—at least through the month’s trial period.”
Mark agreed reluctantly.
“Since I expected to be away only a few days when I left Alexandria, I’ll have to return home to get some more clothes and put my affairs in order for an extended stay. Will it be convenient if I start working a week from Monday?”
“Yes, we can manage until then.”
As Alice prepared to leave, she asked, “How much authority will I have over the children and the household? If I have to get your okay every time I need to make a decision, your burden won’t lift at all.”
Mark’s blue eyes looked long and intently into Alice’s brown ones, and she met his gaze unflinchingly. At last, he reached for her hand. “My primary concern is for Kristin and Eddie, and I believe I can trust you with the welfare of my family—that’s all I’m concerned about at this point.”
He squeezed her hand and walked with her to the car.
“If you need to contact me, Betty will know where I am,” Alice said, and waved to him as she backed out of the driveway.
An hour later, sitting in Betty’s office, Alice paced the floor and gave Betty her impression of the Tanners, excluding only her physical attraction to Mark.
“My hands were itching to pull back the draperies, wash the windows and let some light into those rooms. And on a nice day like this, both Kristin and Eddie should have been outdoors, not cooped up in the house. How sick is Eddie, anyway?”
“As I understand, surgery has completely repaired the damage to his heart, and he’s able to resume a normal life. You can find out from his father or pediatrician what he’s able to do. I don’t believe Mark will give you any opposition. He’s the best organized preacher we’ve ever had at our church, and it must frustrate him to see his household in such disorder, but he’s simply in over his head.”
“I suppose that’s the reason I decided to help him.”
“But let me caution you, Alice. I know you, and you’ll want to move in there and expect an overnight miracle. It won’t happen that way. Their home life has been going downhill for two years—you won’t change it in a few days.”
Alice shook her head despairingly. “You’re right, and I’ll try to go slow. But there is something I can do. This morning, a friend telephoned Kristin and invited her to go to church camp. Mark had to refuse because he couldn’t afford it, and I want to provide that money anonymously. Will you handle it for me?”
She reached in her purse and removed seventy-five dollars.
“No problem. I’ll put the money in a blank envelope, mark it for Kristin Tanner’s camp expenses and drop it in the offering plate Sunday. No one will ever need to know.”
Alice paused in her pacing to straighten a picture on the wall. “I’m not completely at ease with this situation, Betty. It’s quite a responsibility, and I’m afraid that I’ll get too involved with the family’s problems. You know I’ve always wanted children of my own. What if I get attached to Eddie and Kristin? It will hurt when I have to leave them.”
“That’s a risk all nannies take, and some of those listed with my agency have been hurt.” Betty observed Alice as she stood looking out the window, and she said compassionately, “But, Alice, why don’t you remarry and have children of your own?”
“I don’t intend to marry another man I don’t love. I couldn’t have found a more considerate, kinder husband than John Larkin, but I didn’t love him, and I haven’t seen any other man I thought I could love.” Mark’s brilliant blue eyes set in his charming face flashed through her mind, and she didn’t look at Betty, fearful that her friend might note the truth in her face.
Betty, a happy wife and proud mother of three, was a noted matchmaker. She took Alice by the shoulders and turned her to face the full-length mirror on the wall behind her desk.
“Look at you,” Betty said, and she enumerated Alice’s features as if she were announcing a beauty contest. “Honey-blond hair, pink-and-white complexion, finely chiseled features, with a smile that always seems to be lurking in steady brown eyes, while also possessing a firmly molded attractive body of above medium height.”
Betty released Alice’s shoulders and perched on the desktop. “You’re wasted as a single person. You must get married again.”
“When I’m ready, I’ll tell you,” Alice said, with a laugh.
Betty’s face became more thoughtful. “Although your chief role at the Tanners is to care for those children, I’m concerned about Mark, too.” She paused and rolled a ballpoint pen back and forth on the desk. “I’ve never known a more effective preacher, and he should be in the ministry—not working in a bank. It was a blow to our congregation when he resigned, and the membership would have taken him back immediately when Clarice died.”
“He didn’t ask for a leave of absence when he left the church?”
“No. He wouldn’t take one when the official board offered it. And while he said he couldn’t come back to the church because he needed a lucrative job to take care of his debts, I’ve wondered if that’s the real reason.”
“Well,” Alice said, “I’ll have to admit when I was so confined with John’s illness and couldn’t see any hope for the future, there were times when my faith faltered. We’ve all been in that position.”
“That’s true, but the doubts eventually fade away. Yet in Mark’s case, I don’t think they have.”
Once back in her own home, Alice’s mind became an emotional pendulum. One moment she’d think, This move is definitely God’s will for my life; then she’d fret, Why can’t I be satisfied with the status quo?
In spite of her doubts, she kept on packing her minivan with clothing and personal items to make her life more pleasant at the Tanners’. As she made arrangements to close her house for a few months, she questioned why she would even consider leaving her comfortable life-style, her spacious three-story brick colonial home, her church friends and her relatives to assume the responsibility of another’s family, to sleep in a bunk bed on a porch, and take on household duties that she paid to have done in her own home.
When she prayed for wisdom, God led her to a verse in the Psalms, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.”
That was the only assurance she had that her decision was the right one, for a visit to her parents, Harley and Norma Taylor, who lived in a retirement community in the nation’s capital, wasn’t encouraging. Norma couldn’t understand why her daughter would want to take on a nanny position.
When Alice had inherited all of John’s assets, her parents took it for granted that they were also recipients of his money, and were never hesitant about asking for financial help. They thought that if Alice wanted to take care of children, she should devote her time to her niece and nephew, children of Nancy, Alice’s single-parent sister, who always had financial needs.
Alice took comfort from her prayers and continued packing.
She timed her arrival for Sunday afternoon, and when she reached the street where the Tanners lived, she compared her present sangfroid to her nervousness the week before.
Mark opened the door before she had time to ring the bell. His wavy hair was tousled, there was a black smudge on his face, and he wore an apron over his jeans with a message printed in flashy letters, What’s A Nice Guy Like You Doing In A Dump Like This?
“You did come back,” he said, and the relief expressed in his eyes and on his face reinforced her belief that it was right to be here.
“What made you think I wouldn’t?” she said in her low voice, as he held the door for her.
“I couldn’t blame anyone for hesitating to take on a job like this one,” he said with a slight laugh.
“In my own strength, I wouldn’t have tackled it, but Mr. Tanner, I believe God is calling me to this position.”
Mark’s face darkened, and he ignored her comment.
“You’re in time to join us for a late lunch, early dinner or whatever. I’m grilling hamburgers in the backyard. We’re about ready to eat. Gran and Kristin are making lemonade. I was going upstairs to bring Eddie down when I heard your car drive in.”
When Mark turned toward the stairs, Alice walked into the kitchen. “Anything I can do to help?” she asked after she greeted Gran and Kristin.
“You can carry out the lemonade, if you like,” Gran said in her halting voice. “I need both hands for my walker, and the pitcher is a bit heavy for Kristin.”
“We’ve got your room ready, Mrs. Larkin,” Kristin said. “Want to see?”
“Sure.”
Alice walked with Kristin to the porch. The mini-blinds were closed, and the room was cool. One corner was piled high with boxes, but the rest of the room had been cleared for her use, and a small chest, chair, table and bunk bed moved in.
“Is the room all right?” she asked anxiously, reminding Alice of a troubled adult.
“I’ll be very comfortable here. I brought my own television, and a few other personal items that I’ll move in later.”
“Daddy says you’re only coming for a month.”
“Maybe longer, if we get along all right.”
“Guess what!” Kristin said excitedly. “I’m going to camp next week. Daddy couldn’t afford to send me, but someone at the church provided the money.”
“That’s great,” Alice agreed. “I’m sure you’ll enjoy church camp—I always did when I was a girl.”
When they returned to the kitchen, Mark was entering with Eddie, stooping low with an arm around the boy to support him. Eddie shuffled along like an old man.
Alice carried the iced beverage, Kristin picked up a package of hamburger buns and a bag of corn chips and they followed Mark and Eddie out to the yard, where hamburgers sizzled on the grill. Gran awkwardly maneuvered her walker down the two short steps, but Alice didn’t offer to help because she gathered that Gran wanted to maintain as much independence as possible.
The backyard was larger than the small weedy area in front of the house, and it was secluded from the neighboring houses by a tall wooden fence that required a coat of water seal. Shrubs needed a good pruning, and the grass was sparse in spots, while weeds grew profusely. A huge evergreen shaded the lawn, littering the whole area with pine needles. A wooden picnic table was situated on a stone patio beside a gas grill sending out tempting aromas.
“Kristin, will you bring the carton of potato salad from the refrigerator?” Mark said as he settled Eddie into a chair. With a dimple-deepening grin at Alice, he added, “I bought it at the deli—I’m not a cook and wouldn’t have time to prepare food if I was.”
“What can I do to help?”
“Not a thing,” he insisted. “This meal is on me. You don’t start work until tomorrow.”
Alice sat in an aluminum folding chair and sipped the lemonade that Kristin brought her.
“What should we call you?” Kristin asked.
“I’d like for you to call me by my first name— Alice.”
The hamburger was overdone and ketchup dripped around the edges of the bun, but Alice ate it, as well as the large pile of corn chips, and scant portion of potato salad that Mark served.
“I’m tired, Daddy,” Eddie whined before Mark had time to eat anything. “I want to go back to my room.”
“Can’t you eat anything else, Son?” Mark asked worriedly.
Eddie shook his curly head, and Mark left his plate and helped Eddie back into the house. Alice watched their departure speculatively. Did Eddie need all this coddling or had they spoiled the boy? she wondered.
Alice turned to Gran. “What is Eddie’s problem? Betty St. Claire told me his surgeries had been successful.”
Speaking with difficulty, Gran said, “The heart’s malfunction has been repaired, but he isn’t gaining much strength.”
“I’ll get Mark’s permission to call his doctor and find out what kind of diet and exercise would help Eddie. He’ll have to be stronger than he is now if he goes to school this fall.”
They spent the rest of the afternoon unloading Alice’s van. Mark whistled in amazement when she opened the rear gate of the van. “Where will we put all these things?”
“We’ll leave most of them in boxes, and I’ll unpack when I need something. I brought my television and computer, and a folding table for them, and there’s plenty of floor room for that. I didn’t notice a computer when I was here last week, and I thought it might be a good way to entertain the children.”
“Kristin has been pestering me to buy a computer,” he said lightly, “but that’s another thing I can’t afford right now.”
“Give it time, Mark. You’ll soon have your affairs in order.” She laid her hand on his arm, and he covered it with his. She was standing closer to him than she should be, and she tried to remove her hand and move away, but he held her with a firm grip.
“For the first time in many months, I believe that. When you came this afternoon, I felt like a burden had been lifted off my back. I can’t understand it. You walk in the house, and suddenly I’m confident that all my troubles are over. Why is that, Alice?”
“I don’t know, Mark, but I’m glad it’s so,” she whispered. “It feels right for me to be here.”
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