Loe raamatut: «The Privileged and the Damned»

Praise for Kimberly Lang

‘This enjoyable tale about a pair who think they’re embarking on a sexy fling that soon turns serious treats readers to all the emotions, and all the highs and lows, that love entails.’

—RT Book Reviews on

The Secret Mistress Arrangement

‘A sizzling tale of lust developing into love …’

—www.cataromance.com on

Magnate’s Mistress … Accidentally Pregnant!

‘Talented author Kimberly Lang delivers a fresh, up-to-date story filled with strong characters and enough sexual tension to set hearts a-twitter. Entertains with witty repartee and sizzling passion.’

—www.cataromance.com on

The Millionaire’s Misbehaving Mistress

About the Author

KIMBERLY LANG hid romance novels behind her textbooks in junior high, and even a Master’s programme in English couldn’t break her obsession with dashing heroes and happily ever after. A ballet dancer turned English teacher, Kimberly married an electrical engineer and turned her life into an ongoing episode of When Dilbert Met Frasier. She and her Darling Geek live in beautiful North Alabama, with their one Amazing Child—who, unfortunately, shows an aptitude for sports.

Visit Kimberly at www.booksbykimberly.com for the latest news—and don’t forget to say hi while you’re there!

Also by Kimberly Lang

Redemption of the Hollywood Starlet

The Power and the Glory

The Girls’ Guide to Flirting with Danger

What Happens in Vegas …

Boardroom Rivals, Bedroom Fireworks!

Magnate’s Mistress … Accidentally Pregnant!

The Millionaire’s Misbehaving Mistress

The Secret Mistress Arrangement

Did you know these are also available as eBooks? Visit www.millsandboon.co.uk

The Privileged and the Damned
Kimberly Lang

www.millsandboon.co.uk

To Jayk and Erica, who should really teach classes on how to raise awesome husbands. I can’t thank you enough for mine.

CHAPTER ONE

GOOSE tossed his head and danced sideways, jerking Lily’s attention back from her reverie just in time to see him angle her dangerously close to a low hanging branch. She ducked at the last second and steered him back to the path. “Behave yourself, you spoiled horse.”

Goose merely snorted in response.

It would be her own fault if Goose’s bad attitude unseated her. She knew better than to let her attention drift—Goose simply loved to challenge a rider and see who was really in charge—but the peace and beauty of the Marshall estate was hypnotic at times. When combined with the gentle cadence of Goose’s walk as he cooled down from his run, it was hard not to let her mind drift away.

All those people who paid money for fancy yoga classes or time on a shrink’s couch just needed to spend half an hour doing exactly this. They could quit twisting themselves into pretzels to meditate or digging up their daddy issues in search of peace. This was free therapy.

No, it was better than free; the Marshalls actually paid her. It was crazy, but true, and she thanked her lucky stars every single day that she’d landed here. It was perfect.

They were almost to the river, and Goose began to trot as the break in the trees grew closer. She could see the early-morning sunlight glinting off the water, and she turned her face up to the sky to let it warm her skin as they crossed the treeline. Goose walked straight to the water’s edge and waded in, and only a sharp tug kept him from going directly to a depth guaranteed to soak her only pair of boots.

“Not this time, Goose. I’m on to your tricks. I’m not walking around with wet feet all day again.”

As if he understood, Goose made a sound suspiciously like a disappointed huff, then lowered his head to drink. Pulling out her own water bottle, she took a moment to enjoy the view of the sun peeping over the mountains in the distance while she drank.

The Marshall estate—Hill Chase—was a little slice of heaven on earth. It was close enough to D.C. to allow easy escape and respite for the various family members immersed in politics and government, but it felt light years away from all that. It was also a business unto itself—as well as the family’s home—and Lily did her best to just blend in with the scores of other employees. She took a deep breath of the clean air and blew it out, and the knowledge she’d been too cautious to really accept settled on her shoulders like the sunshine.

Her social worker had told her this day would come. Lily hadn’t believed Jerry then, but now …

She really could start over. She already had, she corrected herself. The Lily she used to be was fading more and more every day, and the Lily she was now had finally begun to feel like the real her—like she’d been trapped inside a box and was just now able to freely move and breathe.

She shook her head to clear away the fanciful thoughts. While she’d be perfectly happy to spend all day right here, she still had two more horses that needed their exercise and a long list of other chores waiting for her at the stable. “Come on, Goose. Let’s go.”

“Already? You just got here.”

Lily nearly jumped out of her skin at the voice, and her water bottle dropped out of her hand to land in the shallow water next to Goose’s feet. She twisted sideways in the saddle to locate the owner of the voice and found a man swimming just a few yards away, only his head and shoulders visible above the water.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.” The man’s grin belied the apology.

“Just startled.” That much was true. The estate was private, and no one knew she was here anyway, so she had no cause to be scared. Plus, as Goose’s head jerked up he whinnied, seeming to recognize the voice. A second later the horse began to wade deeper toward the man, completely ignoring her scolds and attempts to stop him.

Thankfully, the man met them halfway, and she was able to tuck her feet up closer to the saddle and out of the water. Goose’s big head lolled in pleasure as the man rubbed his nose, the reunion causing them both to ignore her for a moment.

And she needed that moment. The man was now close enough for her to recognize him: Ethan Marshall, one of Senator Marshall’s many grandsons. She’d heard he was just back from an extended trip overseas—hell, the whole estate was abuzz with the news—and though she’d seen plenty of pictures, those pictures were nothing compared to reality.

All the Marshalls were genetically lucky—honey-blond hair, deep green eyes, strong jawlines under high cheekbones—but Ethan seemed to have won the lottery, combining those individual features into something more … more … Just more. Thick hair—curling just the slightest bit around his ears—dripped water onto broad, tanned shoulders. There, the droplets joined with others to run in rivulets over a set of lovely pecs and abs before meeting the water lapping his waist.

She jerked her eyes back up. Mercy. The man was gorgeous enough to give a girl heart palpitations, and when he looked up from Goose to meet her eyes and smile—seemingly aware she’d been checking him out, much to her mortification—the full effect was enough to cause her to sway in the saddle the tiniest bit.

“I’m Ethan Marshall.”

“I know.” Eyes up. No gawking. “It’s nice to finally meet you.” She backed Goose up a bit, to relieve the strain on her thighs from holding her feet out of the water, but Ethan didn’t follow. He looked at her expectantly and she searched for something else to say, but her brain was misfiring a bit now that she had his full attention. “Welcome back.”

“Thanks. And you are …?”

Her cheeks heated. Idiot. “Lily. Lily Black.”

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, too, Lily. How many times did Goose soak your boots before you figured him out?”

“Three.” He smirked, and she shrugged. “I’m a slow learner, I guess.”

“Well, Tinker will do the same thing, too, if you didn’t know that already.”

Tinker was Ethan’s horse, a huge white stallion with a mischievous streak worse than Goose’s. “Tinker dumped me completely in the river on my second day.” At Ethan’s smile, she made the rest of the confession. “He then took off and left me to walk back to the stable.”

Ethan laughed, a warm yet totally masculine sound that made her insides feel a bit gooey. “I heard about that. Didn’t know it was you, though. Maybe I should apologize.”

“Why?” His small shrug said a lot. “Did you teach him to do that?”

“It kept my brothers and cousins off my horse when I wasn’t around.” The unrepentant grin was slightly infectious and kept her at ease with the conversation. How long had it been since she’d had a friendly discussion about absolutely nothing at all? It was a nice feeling—even if it was a strange one, rusty from disuse.

“Your horse is rotten. It’s a good thing he’s pretty.”

He winked at her, catching her totally off guard. “I’ve heard the same is said about me.”

The statement could have been full of smug assurance of his good looks, but the tone made it sound self-deprecating. Unfortunately, it also had her eyes going back to the acres of tanned, sculpted skin. “Pretty” was a gross understatement of the man’s very ample charms.

Goose was pulling against the reins, trying to move back out to the deeper water and Ethan, thankfully giving her something to concentrate on since she’d lost track of the conversation due to her wandering eyes. Goose snorted and shook his head, but she wasn’t giving in. Not in front of Ethan Marshall. She didn’t want him thinking she couldn’t handle the horse.

“I think he’s just happy to see you, Mr. Marshall. He’s normally much better behaved with me.”

“Ethan,” he corrected. “Just Ethan. There are way too many Mr. Marshalls around here to keep up with.”

Lily felt her face warm, but it wasn’t with embarrassment this time. “Okay. Ethan it is.” When he smiled this time, it caused a little shiver to run over her skin. That, along with the restless movements of Goose, brought her focus back where it belonged. “Um, I should probably get back to the stable. It was nice meeting you.”

Ethan nodded. “And you, Lily.”

She turned Goose back toward the shore and saw her water bottle in the shallows. “Mr. Marsh—I mean, Ethan—could you grab that bottle for me?”

“Nope.”

She twisted around in the saddle to face him. The smirk on his face made her wonder if she’d totally misjudged him. It was a relatively simple request. Was his ego that big? A high-and-mighty Marshall was too good to retrieve a water bottle for one of the staff?

“I wouldn’t normally ask, but I’m only wearing half-chaps, and if I get down my boots will fill with water.”

Ethan shrugged a muscular shoulder. “Sorry. Can’t be helped.”

Maybe he was that smug after all.

The smirk grew worse as he crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m sure you didn’t notice, but I’m only wearing water at the moment.”

Lily felt her face heat again as the full meaning of his words filtered though. She’d been carrying on a conversation not six feet away from him—and he’d been naked the whole time? Her eyes—she just couldn’t help it—retraced their earlier path down his chest and stomach to the waterline, which she now knew covered …

Ethan’s chuckle caused her to jerk her head up and twist in the saddle so quickly her neck spasmed and Goose protested. “If I go get it, one of us could be embarrassed …” He trailed off, leaving no question as to which one of them it would be.

Oh, dear Lord. She was already embarrassed enough. Focusing her eyes on the shoreline, she saw a pile of clothes on one of the rocks. Dammit. Why couldn’t she have noticed that just a little sooner? She’d been ogling the man’s chest and stomach, and only inches below the waterline was … Her cheeks felt like they were on fire now.

“Still want me to get it?”

There was laughter and challenge in those words, and then she heard splashes, like Ethan might be making his way to shore after all.

“No!” She paused and cleared her throat. “I mean, never mind. I’ll get it.” Without looking at him, she dismounted, grabbed the bottle, and mounted again in record time. She dug her heels into Goose, feeling the water slosh around her toes, and set him into a trot. She didn’t really care if it looked like the cowardly retreat it was; she had to get out of there before she died of embarrassment.

The sound of Ethan’s laughter followed her, and it was all Lily could do not to kick Goose into a gallop.

Naked.

He’d been naked the whole time.

Distance from the scene of the crime helped her calm her heart-rate, but with that calm came unease. Ethan found it funny right now, but would he still find it amusing later on? What if he told others—like his grandmother? Mrs. Marshall wouldn’t find it one bit funny.

Could she get fired for this? The thought chilled her. More than just the job, she loved—needed—the security of Hill Chase. It gave her a place to live and peace of mind. The thought of losing that because she’d been blinded by charm and a chest and not noticed he was skinny-dipping …

He was naked the whole time.

How will I ever be able to look him in the eye again?

Naked.

How could I have known?

It was an accident.

Lily lifted her chin. Exactly. An accident. No harm done. So the chances of losing her job were very, very low. She had to quit jumping straight to The Worst-Case Scenario all the time. The next time she saw Ethan—and it was guaranteed she would see him sooner rather than later, since the stable wasn’t that big—she’d pretend it didn’t happen. That would be the grown-up thing to do. Surely he’d like to forget the whole thing ever happened too.

So would she, but every time she closed her eyes she could see …

Nope. There would be no forgetting for her. Ethan Marshall wearing nothing but river water would be an image she’d take with her to her grave.

And, actually, she was really okay with that.

“Want to tell me what the hell that was all about?” Brady asked as he swung up onto Spider’s back later that afternoon.

Ethan bit back a laugh as he checked the stirrups and mounted Tinker. Using his best innocent voice, he played dumb. “What was what about?”

“Lily tripping all over herself back at the stables and turning that amazing shade of red.” Brady gave him that Big Brother look. “What did you do to her?”

“I’ve been here less than twelve hours. What makes you think I could ‘do’ anything to her?”

Brady snorted. “This is you we’re talking about.”

Lily’s reaction when they’d walked into the stable had been almost comical. She’d taken one look at him, blushed the color of an overripe tomato, and nearly dropped the tack she carried. “Maybe she’s always like that.”

“I have to assume not, because she’d scare the horses otherwise.”

“You assume? I thought you made a point of knowing everything about everything.”

“I’ve barely spoken three words to her since she started working here.”

Tinker and Spider walked slowly through the wide stable doors into the sunshine, and Ethan slid his sunglasses on against the glare. “Too good these days to talk to the hired help, are you?”

“Back off. It’s not like I’m here all the time. I have a job, too, you know.” Ethan heard the mild frustration and tiredness in Brady’s voice. He was hip-deep in the political machine that practically defined their family—and had for more than forty years. Apparently it was wearing on him already. “She’s barely spoken three words to me either. She’s not the talkative type. Very shy.”

Based on earlier today, Ethan would believe Lily was a little on the quiet side, but he wouldn’t have guessed she was overly shy. Spider and Tinker were impatient and ready to run, but had to be held to a slower pace as he filled Brady in on their meeting in the river.

“And she didn’t realize it?”

“Not until I told her.”

“Oh, that’s bad,” Brady said through his laughter. “You really should have told her sooner. No wonder she’s all flustered now.”

“She’ll get over it.” When Brady didn’t immediately agree, Ethan reined Tinker to a stop. “What?”

“Maybe you should apologize to her.”

“For what? What did I do?”

“Besides not telling her you were skinny-dipping sooner in the conversation?”

“We’re adults—”

“It doesn’t matter. You’re staying here for the next couple of weeks. That—” he tilted his head back in the direction of the stable “—can’t continue. Give the girl a break. If you don’t, you’re a sadist every time you come to the stable.”

Brady had a point. Although renovations should have been finished a week ago, the workmen still had his condo ripped apart. Hill Chase would be his home base until they finished. And, while he doubted the work that had piled up in his absence would leave him much free time, he fully intended to make the most of any he managed to scrape out. He’d be around the stables a lot in the near future. If Lily was that flustered about their meeting, it would be cruel of him to let it continue.

Brady’s phone rang and he fished it out of his pocket. A glance at the number had him rolling his eyes. “I have to take this.”

Ethan nodded. Campaign season was about to go into full swing, and their father was in a hell of a fight to keep his Senate seat. Personally, Ethan didn’t care if the current Senator Marshall kept his seat, but Granddad—whose Senate legacy was a plank in his son’s platform, and probably the only reason Douglas Marshall had won in the first place—cared very deeply. And while Brady’s sense of duty managed to outweigh his own feelings toward their father, Ethan’s didn’t. He couldn’t bring himself to help his father, but out of respect for Granddad he managed not to hinder either.

But Brady, as one of the senior staffers, would be even more swamped than usual between now and the election. Ethan was actually surprised he’d gotten away today even for a short visit. Campaigns and politicking didn’t take Sundays off.

Brady let his reins go slack, and Spider walked over to the side of the path to nibble on grass while Brady dealt with whatever the problem was. Tinker tugged on the reins, impatient to get going, but Ethan held him steady, waiting for Brady. He was home, finally, and happy just to be here. He wasn’t in a real rush to get anywhere right now.

Over in the next paddock, he saw Lily leading Biscuit slowly by the halter. He hadn’t known Biscuit had been injured, but the white wrapping on her foreleg and the slow, even pace Lily kept were clear indications the horse was on the mend from something.

Lily looked small standing next to Biscuit—he hadn’t been able to truly tell her height this morning from her position on Goose’s back. The dark green T-shirt with the “Marshall Stable” logo was a bit loose, almost camouflaging her curves, but she’d rolled the sleeves up over her shoulders, exposing nicely toned arms. The T-shirt was tucked into a pair of snug-fitting jeans that outlined the muscular thighs and calves he

had noted earlier, before disappearing into the half-chaps.

Lily seemed to be talking to Biscuit, the action causing her long black ponytail to sway slightly, and Biscuit bobbed her head occasionally like she agreed with whatever Lily was saying. As if she felt the weight of his stare, Lily suddenly turned and looked over her shoulder, those black eyebrows disappearing behind her bangs when she saw him watching her.

Brady was still barking into his phone, and it sounded like he would be for at least a few more minutes, so Ethan turned Tinker in Lily’s direction. He could go ahead and get that apology out of the way.

Surprisingly, Lily met him at the fence. She looked up, shading her eyes against the sun, and though her cheeks looked a little pink, the earlier fluster was gone. Maybe the flush was from the heat.

“Is something wrong?” Concern showed in her big brown eyes as she looked over at Brady. “I thought y’all were going riding.”

He dismounted. “We are. Brady’s dealing with something at work right this second, so I came to apologize.”

“Apologize? For what?” She seemed genuinely confused.

“For this morning—”

Lily shook her head. “I think I’m the one who owes you an apology. I’m terribly embarrassed—”

“So I gathered.”

“I’d been trying to figure out how to apologize to you and then you walked in … Well, it caught me off guard.” Lily wasn’t quite meeting his eyes now.

“Well—” He was cut off as Tinker bumped him aside and nuzzled Lily’s shoulder, catching her ponytail and tugging on it. “Hey!” He scolded the horse.

Lily smiled as she scratched Tinker between his eyes—his favorite spot. She knew his horse well, it seemed. “It’s okay. You goofus,” she murmured affectionately to the horse, flipping her hair back over her shoulder out of Tinker’s reach.

Brady had pegged Lily wrong. She wasn’t terribly shy, only quiet. Just like he thought. Since Brady hated to be wrong, Ethan couldn’t wait to rub that in. He relaxed into the conversation. “I thought you said he was rotten.”

“Oh, he is. To the core.” Tinker was reveling in the attention, even butting Biscuit aside when she tried to horn in on Lily’s affection.

“He certainly seems to like you. And Tinker doesn’t like many people.”

“He knows I’m a sucker for a charming pretty boy. We got off to a bad start that day at the river, but he won me over, and we get along just fine now. Don’t we, boy?” she cooed at the horse.

“Then there’s hope for me, too,” he teased.

Lily froze for a second, then her brown eyes met his fully for the first time since that morning. A tug pulled at the corner of her mouth. “Are you comparing yourself to your horse?”

Oh, no, Lily wasn’t shy, and that knowledge sparked something in him. He waggled his eyebrows in a leer. “In many ways.”

Lily’s mouth fell open at the innuendo, but she recovered quickly. “So the rumors are true …”

He cleared his throat, a tiny bit worried. “Rumors that …?”

“That you’re a charming pretty boy, rotten to the core.”

That caused him to smile. “Guilty as charged.”

“At least you’re honest about it.”

“Honesty is important, don’t you think?”

She paused briefly. “Usually.”

How strange. “Only usually? Not always?”

The briefest of shadows crossed her face. He’d have missed it entirely if he weren’t so focused on her. “Life’s too complicated to draw lines like that. Sometimes a small lie is better than the truth.”

“I’d have to disagree with you, Lily.”

“Really?” She tilted her head sideways. “You believe in one-hundred percent honesty all the time?”

“Yep.”

She scoffed. “That’s not something I expected from you.”

He stiffened automatically, but tried to keep his voice merely curious. “And why is that?”

“You do know your family’s in politics, right?”

His loud bark of laughter had both horses looking at him in as much surprise as Lily. “Ergo my extreme desire for honesty above all else.”

She laughed as well. “Then I’ll keep that in mind.”

Brady and Spider joined them at that moment. “Well, this is certainly an improvement from earlier.”

Ethan could hear the tease in Brady’s voice, but Lily flushed and her voice dropped anyway. “Sorry about that, Mr. Marshall.” No wonder Brady thought she was painfully shy.

“No worries, Lily.” Brady winked at her, and the spurt of anger Ethan felt surprised him. “I’m sure it was all Ethan’s fault.”

“Gee, thanks.”

Brady shrugged. “Hey, the truth hurts sometimes.”

Both he and Lily laughed, leaving Brady looking confused. Finally, he shook his head and gave up. “You ready, E?”

“Yep.” He swung up on Tinker and adjusted the reins. “See you later, Lily.”

“Have fun.” She waved as they left.

Brady looked distracted as he kicked Spider into a trot.

Tinker automatically adjusted his speed to catch up. “Everything okay?”

Brady blew out his breath. “Just the usual messes. I’m going to have to head back tonight.”

“Nana will be disappointed.”

He shook his head. “Not as disappointed as she’ll be if I don’t go back to straighten this out and we lose this election.”

“Maybe he needs to lose.”

Brady sighed. “He’s a lousy father, and a sorry excuse for a human being most days, but amazingly enough he’s a damn good legislator. He learned that much from Granddad.”

The contradiction didn’t sit well with him. “Still, I don’t know how you do it.”

“I look at the bigger picture, Ethan.”

“There’s a bigger picture?”

“Yeah, it’s called the greater good. Dad isn’t afraid to champion the tough issues or stand up for the little guy. He’s doing good things, and I have to support that.”

“I’ll have to take your word for it.”

Brady smirked. “Does that mean we can count on your vote?”

“Do you want the truth?”

Brady answered without looking at him. “Not really.”

“Then I’ll just keep my mouth shut.”

“There’s a first time for everything.”

“Wow.” Ethan put his hand on his chest in mock anguish. “Not feeling the love today.”

“Like I said, there’s a first time for everything. And it didn’t look like it was from lack of trying, either.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Brady’s look was steady. “Lily,” he challenged.

“You wanted me to apologize, and I did. End of story.”

“If you say so.” Brady’s lips twitched. “You know, I never really noticed her before. She’s quite cute. Nice legs. Shame I have to go back to the city tonight …”

Ethan knew when he was being needled, but it didn’t counter the sudden unpleasant and completely irrational need to knock Brady off his horse. Brady’s laugh only exacerbated that need. As if Brady read his mind, he dug his heels into Spider and the stallion leapt forward. Tinker reared up on his back legs, ready to go, and Ethan let him give chase.

It was good to be home.

Lily watched the two men banter as they rode away, the brotherly affection and annoyance obvious in equal parts. When Tinker took off in a gallop, her breath caught in her throat. Granted, the horse was beautiful, impressive, but the man on his back was far more so. Ethan looked like he’d been born in the saddle, moving easily with the horse and looking like some kind of centaur as he closed the gap between him and his brother easily. She could hear shouts and whinnies, and then the horses and their riders disappeared into the woods.

Over the past three months she’d figured out most of the Marshalls. They were a big family, with plenty of the private drama that came from the sheer number of them. There was also plenty of public drama—not unexpected, considering their wealth and power. Something always seemed to be swirling, whether it gave the tabloids their headlines or the eleven o’clock news its lead item or just had one or more Marshalls closeted in the former senator’s study. They often fought amongst themselves, but they closed ranks and presented a unified front when attacked from the outside.

It was nice, yet odd at the same time. She really had no frame of reference to help make sense of it, either.

And now, just when she thought she was starting to figure it out, Ethan appeared on the scene, totally unlike what the rumors had led her to expect, and completely changing the energy she felt on the estate.

Energy radiated off him and made her tingle in unusual ways. And, while it still flustered her a little to have those green eyes on her, she had to secretly confess that the fluster wasn’t all that bad a feeling. It made her feel … “Alive” wasn’t the right word, but it was close.

Rumor had it that he would be staying on the estate for a while. Something about his place being refurbished and unable to be lived in. She’d probably be seeing more of him—she pushed back the mental image of the more she’d almost seen this morning—and the fact she didn’t mind at all felt like a big step forward.

Too bad he had that whole thing about honesty.