Submission to Divine Providence in the Death of Children

This good Woman had found the Prophet Elisha grateful for all the Favours he had received at her House; where she had from time to time accommodated him in his Journies, and thought it an Honour rather than an Incumbrance. She had experienced the Power of his Prayers, in answer to which the Child had been given; and ’tis extremely probable, that she also recollected the Miracle which Elijah had wrought a few Years before, tho’ till that Time the like had not been known in Israel, or on Earth; I mean, in raising from the Dead the Child of that Widow of Sarepta¹⁷ , who had nourished him during the Famine. She might therefore think it a possible Case, that the Miracle might be renewed; at least, she knew not how to comfort herself better, than by going to so good a Friend, and asking his Counsels and his Prayers, to enable her to bear her Affliction, if it must not be removed¹⁸ ,

Accordingly she hasted to him; and he, on the other side, discovered the Temper of a real Friend, in the Message with which he sent Gehazi his Servant to meet her, while she was yet afar off. The Moment she appeared, the Concerns of her whole Family seem to have come into his kind Heart at once, and he particularly asks, Is it well with thee? Is it well with thine Husband? Is it well with the Child? A beautiful Example of that affectionate Care for the Persons and Families of their Friends, which Christian Ministers (who, like the Prophets of old, are called Men of God¹⁹) should habitually bear about in their Hearts; which should be awakened by every Sight of them, and expressed on every proper Occasion.

Her Answer was very remarkable: She said, It is well. Perhaps she meant this, to divert the more particular Enquiry of the Servant; as she had before made the same Answer to her Husband, when he had examined into the Reason of her intended Journey, as probably not knowing of the sad Breach which had been made: She said, It is well²⁰ ; which was a civil way of intimating her Desire that he would not ask any more particular Questions. But I cannot see any Reason to restrain the Words to this Meaning alone: We have ground to believe, from the Piety she expressed in her first Regards to Elisha, and the Opportunities which she had of improving in Religion by the frequent Converse of that holy Man, that when she used this Language, she intended thereby to express her Resignation to the Divine Will in what had lately pass’d: And this might be the Meaning of her Heart, (tho’ one ignorant of the Particulars of her Case, might not fully understand it from such ambiguous Words; ) “It is well on the whole. Though my Family be afflicted, we are afflicted in Faithfulness; tho’ my dear Babe be dead, yet my Heavenly Father is just, and he is good in all. He knows how to bring Glory to himself, and Advantage to us, from this Stroke. Whether this Application do, or do not succeed, whether the Child be, or be not restored, it is still well; well with him, and well with us; for we are in such wise and such gracious Hands, that I would not allow one murmuring Word, or one repining Thought.” So that, on the whole, the Sentiment of this good Shunamite was much the same with that of Hezekiah, when he answered to that dreadful Threatning which imported the Destruction of his Children, Good is the Word of the Lord which he hath spoken²¹; or that of Job, when he heard that all his Sons and his Daughters were crushed under the Ruins of their elder Brother’s House, and yet (in the fore-cited Words) blessed the Name of the Lord.

Now this is the Temper to which, by divine Assistance, we should all labour to bring our own Hearts, when God puts this bitter Cup into our Hands, and takes away with a Stroke those dear Little-ones, which were the Desire of our Eyes²², and the Joy of our Hearts. Let us not content ourselves, in such Circumstances, with keeping the Door of our Lips²³, that we break not out into any Indecencies of Complaint; let us not attempt to harden ourselves against our Sorrows by a stern Insensibility, or that sullen Resolution which sometimes says, It is a Grief, and I must bear it²⁴ ; but let us labour, (for a great Labour it will indeed be,) to compose and quiet our Souls, calmly to acquiesce in this painful Dispensation, nay, cordially to approve it as in present Circumstances every Way fit.

It will be the main Business of this Discourse, to prove how reasonable such a Temper is, or to shew how much Cause Christian Parents have to borrow the Language of the Text, when their Infant Offspring is taken away, and to say with the pious Shunamite, in the noblest Sense that her Words will bear,—It is well.

And here I would more particularly shew,—It is well in the general, because God does it:—It is surely well for the pious Parents in particular, because it is the Work of their Covenant God:—They may see many Respects in which it is evidently so, by observing what useful Lessons it has a Tendency to teach them:—And they have Reason to hope, it is well with those dear Creatures whom God hath removed in their early Days.

These are surely convincing Reasons to the Understanding: Yet who can say, that they shalt be Reasons to the Heart? Arise, O God, and plead thine own Cause²⁵ in the most effectual Manner! May thy powerful and gracious Voice appease the swelling Billows of the Passions, and produce a great and delightful Calm in our Souls, in which we may yet enjoy thee and ourselves, tho’ a Part of our Treasure be for the present swallowed up!

I. There is surely Reason, in such a Case, to say it is well,—because God doth it.

This pass’d for an unanswerable Reason with David, I was dumb, I opened not my Mouth, because thou didst it²⁶, and with good old Eli, under a severer Tryal than ours, It is the Lord, let him do as seemeth good in his Sight²⁷. And shall We object against the Force of it? Was it a Reason to David, and to Eli, and is it not equally so to us? Or have We any new Right to reply against God²⁸, which those eminent Saints had not?

His kingdom ruleth over all ²⁹; and there is not so much as a Sparrow that falls to the Ground without our Father, but the very Hairs of our Head are all number’d³⁰ by him. Can we then imagine that our dear Children fall into their Graves without his Notice or Interposition? Did that watchful Eye that keepeth Israel, now, for the first time, slumber and sleep³¹, and an Enemy lay hold on that fatal Moment to bear away these precious Spoils, and bury our Joys and our Hopes in the Dust? Did some malignant Hand stop up the Avenues of Life, and break its Springs, so as to baffle all the Tenderness of the Parent, and all the Skill of the Physician? Whence does such a Thought come, and whither would it lead? Diseases and Accidents are but second Causes, which owe all their Operations to the continued Energy of the great original Cause. Therefore God says, I will bereave them of Children³²; I take away the Desire of thine Eyes with a Stroke³³. He changeth their Countenance, and sendeth them away³⁴. Thou Lord turnest Man to Destruction, and sayest, Return ye Children of Men³⁵ . And what shall we say? Are not the Administrations of his Providence wise and good? Can we teach him Knowledge³⁶? Can we tax him with Injustice? Shall the Most High God learn of us how to govern the World, and be instructed by our Wisdom when to remove his Creatures from one State of Being to another? Or do we imagine that his Administration, in the general Right and Good, varies when he comes to touch our Bone and our Flesh³⁷ ? Is that the secret Language of our Soul, “That it is well, others should drink of the Cup, but not We; that any Families but ours should be broken, and any Hearts but ours should be wounded?” Who might not claim the like Exemption? and what would become of the Divine Government in general; or where would be his obedient Homage from his Creatures, if each should begin to complain, as soon as it comes to his own Turn to suffer? Much fitter is it for us to conclude, that our own Afflictions may be as reasonable as those of others; that amidst all the Clouds and Darkness of this present Dispensation, Righteousness and Judgment are the Habitation of his Throne³⁸ ; and, in a word, that it is well, because God hath done it. It suits the general Scheme of the Divine Providence, and to an obedient submissive Creature that might be enough; but it is far from being all. For,

II. Pious Parents, under such a Dispensation, may conclude it is well for them in particular,—because he, who hath done it, is their Covenant God.

This is the great Promise, to which all the Saints under the Old and New Testament are Heirs, I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a People³⁹ : And if we are interested in it, the happy Consequence is, that we being his, all our Concerns are his also; all are humbly resigned to him,—and graciously administer’d by him,—and incomparably better Blessings bestowed and secured, than any which the most afflictive Providence can remove.

If we have any Share in this everlasting Covenant, all that we are or have, must, of course, have been solemnly surrender’d to God. And this is a Thought peculiarly applicable to the Case immediately in view. “Did I not,” may the Christian, in such a sad Circumstance, generally say, “did I not, in a very solemn Manner, bring this my Child to God in Baptism, and in that Ordinance recognize his Right to it? Did I not, with all humble Subjection to the Father of Spirits⁴⁰ , and Father of Mercies⁴¹, lay it down at his Feet, perhaps with an express, at least to be sure with a tacit Consent, that it should be disposed of by him, as his infinite Wisdom and Goodness should direct, whether for Life or for Death? And am I now to complain of him, because he has removed not only a Creature of his own, but one of the Children of his Family? Or shall I pretend, after all, to set up a Claim in Opposition to his? A Heathen Parent, even from the Light of Nature, might have learn’d silent Submission: How much more then a Christian Parent, who hath presented his Child to God in this initiatory Ordinance; and perhaps also many a time, both before and since, hath presented himself at the Table of the Lord! Have I not there taken that Cup of Blessings, with a declared Resolution of accepting every other Cup how bitter soever it might be, which my heavenly Father should see fit to put into my Hand⁴²? When I have perhaps felt some painful Fore-bodings of what I am now suffering; I have, in my own Thoughts, particularly singled out that dear Object of my Cares and my Hopes, to lay it down anew at my Father’s Feet, and say, Lord thou gavest it to me, and I resign it to thee; continue, or remove it, as thou pleasest. And did I then mean to trifle with God? Did I mean in effect to say, Lord, I will give it up, if thou wilt not take it?”

Reflect farther, I beseech you, on your secret Retirements, and think, as surely some of you may, “How often have I there been on my Knees before God on account of this Child; and what was then my Language? Did I say, Lord, I absolutely insist on its Recovery; I cannot, on any Terms or any Considerations whatsoever, bear to think of losing it?” Sure we were none of us so indecently transported with the fondest Passion, as to be so rash with our Mouths as to utter such Things before the Great God⁴³. Such Presumption had deserv’d a much heavier Punishment than we are now bearing, and, if not retracted, may perhaps still have it.—Did not one or another of us rather say, “Lord, I would humbly intreat, with all due Submission to thy superior Wisdom and sovereign Pleasure, that my Child may live; but if it must be otherwise, not my Will, but thine be done⁴⁴ ? I and mine are in thine Hand, do with me, and with them, as seemeth good in thy Sight⁴⁵ ”. And do we now blame ourselves for this? Would we unsay it again, and, if possible, take ourselves and our Children out of his Hands, whom we have so often owned as all-wise and all-gracious, and have chosen as our great Guardian and theirs?

Let it farther be consider’d, it is done by that God who has accepted of this Surrender, so as to undertake the Administration of our Affairs: “He is become my Covenant God in Christ,” may the Christian say; “and, in consequence of that Covenant, he hath engaged to manage the Concerns and Interests of his People so, that all Things shall work together for good to them that love him⁴⁶ : And do I not love him? Answer, Oh my Heart, dost thou not love thy God much better than all the Blessings which Earth can boast, or which the Grave hath swallowed up? Wouldst thou resign thine Interest in him to recover these precious Spoils, to receive this dear Child from the Dust, a thousand times fairer and sweeter than before? Rather let Death devour every remaining Comfort, and leave me alone with him; with whom when I indeed am, I miss not the Creatures, but rather rejoice in their Absence, as I am then more intire with him whom my Soul loveth. And if I do indeed love him, this Promise is mine, and all Things, and therefore this sad Event in particular, shall work together for my good. Shall I not then say, It is well? What if it exceeded all the Stretch of my Thoughts, to conceive how it could, in any Instance, be so? What are my narrow Conceptions, that they should pretend to circumscribe infinite Wisdom, Faithfulness, and Mercy? Let me rather, with Abraham, give Glory to God, and in Hope believe against Hope⁴⁷ ”.