Love Like Ours

Cristiano pressed a hand to his heart. “I am a big boy,” he told her. “I can look after myself. Even in New York City.” He kissed her lightly.

They reached Mallory’s apartment, and, after paying the cab driver, went inside, settling down for a quiet evening on the couch watching TV. A little after nine pm, Keira’s plan paid off – Mallory did indeed retire to bed.

Then for the first time in ages, Keira felt herself finally relax. She’d been pretty on edge ever since landing back home. Between Bryn’s craziness, her mom’s craziness, and a whistle-stop tour of the city, she felt like she had hardly had time to catch her breath. At last she could really take stock of things, of Cristiano and the fact he had traveled halfway across the world to be with her.

She kissed him, savoring the taste of him. There was something different now in their kisses. A greater intensity. Now she was on home turf, everything had become very real. He’d made something of a commitment and that changed things for the better.

“I suppose you’ll be wanting to see my room soon?” she asked, using her sultry voice.

Cristiano picked up her tone immediately, raising his eyebrows in excited anticipation. “I definitely would.”

She stood from the couch and reached down, offering her hand.

“Then you’d better follow me,” she purred.

Looking like the cat who caught the cream, Cristiano did exactly as she said.

Chapter Six

Keira woke the next morning feeling groggy. But the moment she rolled over and caught sight of Cristiano’s gorgeous face, she sighed with content. Last night had been wonderful, and put all her fears to rest. It was just a shame that she would have to leave him and go to work!

She slid out of bed, careful not to wake him, and headed out into the corridor. Everything was very dark as she padded across the floor towards the bathroom.

Showering at her mom’s felt so strange. Keira couldn’t remember the last time she’d had cause to stay the night here. It certainly hadn’t happened in the last two years because she’d been living with Zachary.

As warm water ran over her skin, Keira wondered if her mom was right. Maybe she didn’t pay her as much attention as she ought to. Cristiano’s relationship with his parents was admirable. It was only the fact Keira put her career at the forefront of everything she did that she didn’t share a similar relationship with her own mom. There was a lot she could learn from him, she realized.

She finished showering quickly and emerged with sopping wet hair, then wrapped herself up in one of her mom’s bamboo towels before heading back out into the hall. As she shuffled through the apartment, a noise caught her attention, coming from the kitchen. Curious, she walked over and peered her head around the door.

“Mom?” she asked, when she saw her mother standing there in her robe.

Her mother yawned. “Morning, darling. Coffee?”

Keira smiled at her mom. “Did you wake up early just to make me coffee?” she asked, touched. She’d just been planning on grabbing one on the way to work.

“It’s not every day I get the chance,” Mallory replied.

Keira went into the kitchen and kissed her mom on the cheek. “That would be great. Thank you,” she said.

Mallory looked surprised. “I think Cristiano is a good influence on you,” she said.

“I think you’re right,” Keira replied.

She went back into her room and dressed in the darkness as the smell of coffee began to seep in from beneath the door. As she emerged back out, daylight was just beginning to break.

“Is he still sleeping?” Mallory asked as Keira came back into the kitchen.

“Yes,” she confirmed, taking the coffee her mom offered her. She took a sip. It was a bit bitter but she could hardly expect her mom to make a perfect cup at this time of the morning! “You won’t bombard him with questions when he wakes up will you?”

Mallory make a tsk noise. “Darling, we need to know who he is. You can’t just declare your love for a new man every month and expect us not to be a little bit suspicious.”

Keira sighed, a little exasperated. “Okay, mom. I get it. I’m acting all crazy lately. Just don’t scare him away.” She downed her coffee then kissed her mom on the cheek again. “I love you. Thanks for dinner.”

Then she hurried off to get the subway to work.

* * *

An hour on the subway was never the best way to start the day. When Keira finally disembarked, she felt grubby, as greasy as if she had not even showered that morning. And her clothes were creased. It wasn’t the sort of impression she wanted to give off on her first day back at the office.

But when she walked in through the large glass doors of Viatorum she needn’t have worried about her appearance at all. Her colleagues leapt up from their seats at the sight of her and hurried over.

“Keira!” Denise cried, hugging her tightly. “You did it.”

“Did what?” Keira asked.

“Saved all of our jobs!” Denise replied. “Now we’re turning a good profit, Lance doesn’t think we need to change anything. No advice columns or recipe pages.” She grimaced.

“Well that’s great,” Keira replied, smiling, not really certain her one article could be held entirely accountable for that.

“When do we get to meet him, then?” Denise asked sounding eager and excited.

“Him?” Keira asked.

“Cristiano!” Denise cried.

Keira noticed the way she swooned as she said it.

“Well, I wasn’t planning on bringing him to the office,” she quipped, a little bemused.

Denise frowned. “But you have to. You can’t make us fall in love with the guy and then not let us meet him! I mean, from your description he sounds gorgeous. Is he gorgeous?”

“Well, yes, but…” Keira began.

“Then you have to let us meet him!” Denise continued. “Please, Keira!”

Keira frowned. Cristiano wasn’t just some prop for her article. He was her real life lover. She felt like Denise had blurred fact and fiction. Had Keira accidentally turned Cristiano into some kind of romance protagonist?

Just then, she noticed Nina at her desk, tapping away at her keyboard, and waved. Nina finished what she was doing and came over. They embraced.

“Nice work of the article, Keira,” Nina said. “Again.”

Keira blushed. “Thanks.”

“It’s nice to have you back.”

“It’s nice to be back,” Keira grinned. “It’s been so long I even enjoyed doing my laundry.”

She went to head towards her office but Nina took hold of her arm, stopping her in her tracks.

“Not so fast,” she said. “Elliot wants to see you.”

“Oh?” Keira asked, glancing towards the open door to his office. She couldn’t help but feel anxious. Even though she and Elliot were on good speaking terms, he was still an imposing figure, thanks in no small part to his huge six foot something frame. “Now?”

“Yup, now,” Nina said, smiling.

There was something in her eye, a secret she was keeping from Keira. It only increased Keira’s feelings of trepidation.

Taking a breath, she changed course and headed for Elliot’s office.

When she entered through the door, he looked up. To Keira’s surprise, he stood and opened his arms to hug her. Keira awkwardly moved into his embrace, feeling like a kid hugging a distant uncle. Friendliness didn’t suit him.

“My hero returns,” Elliot said, taking his seat again. “I’m sure you’ve heard the news?”

“What news exactly?” Keira asked.

“About the subscription increase.”

“No…” Keira admitted.

Elliot continued. “They’re soaring. Lance is thrilled. He said as long as we can keep this up he’ll have no need to intervene in the magazine’s direction at all. Everything can stay exactly as it is. As long as you keep doing what you’re doing.”

Keira wasn’t entirely sure how to interpret that. “In what way?”

“The love articles,” Elliot said. “The Romance Guru.”

Keira felt a sudden heaviness in her chest. Hadn’t Elliot actually read her last article? She was in love now. Genuine love with a real human man who wanted to be with her. Not like Shane who had other priorities. This time, Cristiano had traveled across the world for her, leaving his home, his family, his work and his country behind. There was no more Romance Guru, not if it required her falling in love again!

“I’m sorry,” Keira began, “Are you saying that you want me to write another Romance Guru article?”

“Of course,” Elliot replied, looking confused. “It’s all anyone wants. Our readers. They love it. Can’t get enough. Insatiable. And we need to keep up the momentum. So we’ll have to send you away again immediately.”

Keira’s heaviness turned to panic. “No,” she gasped. “You can’t. I’ve only been back two nights!”

How long would it take for Bryn to get her claws into Cristiano? For Maxine to start sniffing around? For her mom to terrify him into leaving? She couldn’t up and go again!

Elliot looked confused. “Keira, everything’s planned,” he said flatly. “Heather has got the flights booked already. Paris, Keira. PARIS. This is the best assignment yet and we’re handing it to you on a plate. The rest of the staff out there would kill for this.”

“I’m sorry…” Keira stammered. “But I can’t. I truly love Cristiano. This isn’t a game for me. I don’t want to leave him. And I don’t want to go somewhere else and try to find love.” She took a deep breath. “If that’s what you need me to do, I’d rather quit.”

Elliot was shaking his head, his eyes averted. To Keira’s surprise, his shoulders began to shake. Was he crying? She knew how close things had come at the magazine to imploding, and she knew how much Elliot had given up for Viatorum, how much it meant to him. But this was her life as well. Surely someone else could take up the Romance Guru mantel? They could even pretend to be her for all she cared! What would it matter to the readers after all?

But then she realized his shaking shoulders were not tears, but laughter. She frowned, annoyed, unable to understand what could be so amusing to him.

“Keira,” Elliot finally said. “I’m not asking you to leave Cristiano. I want you to go together.”

Keira paused, stunned by the revelation. “Together?”

“Yes!” Elliot cried. “Our readers love him. People are painting pictures of him and putting them on the internet! He’s all anyone can talk about on the forums.”

“Forums?” Keira repeated.

She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Had her descriptions really painted such a good picture of her Italian tour guide that she’d inadvertently made him into some kind of hero?

“I don’t get it,” she said. “You want us to go together?”

“Your love story is a hit, Keira,” Elliot told her. “People want to know how it works out. Hashtag Team Shane or Hashtag Team Cristiano. Who will she marry?”

“MARRY?” Keira cried. “What is going on? I think you’re all getting a bit ahead of yourselves. I’ve only known Cristiano for a few weeks. I’m not thinking about marriage. And he isn’t either!” She folded her arms, feeling defensive, like some kind of spectacle.

Elliot softened his voice, clearly picking up on her distress at last. “Keira, what we want to see is more of you and him. What would it look like in Paris? Can your love last in a new place? Of course in Italy, on his home turf, it worked. And back here when you’re surrounded by your creature comforts it works. But somewhere new? What about that? Neutral, equal ground. Can love last in a foreign place?”

Keira blinked at him, stunned into silence. “You want to… put my relationship under stress to see if it breaks?”

Elliot tipped his head to the side. He clearly hadn’t thought about it that way. “Well, I mean, I wasn’t expecting it to break you up. Just curious.”

“Curious,” Keira repeated, feeling more and more put out. “This is my life, Elliot. My real, actual life. I’m not a lab rat.”

Elliot shook his head. “I’m saying this all wrong,” he said. “Look, the whole idea is that you guys get to spend a month in Paris. You do the travel thing, the love thing. Write it all up. The readers are happy. You two are happy. I’m happy. Period. The End.”

“Except it’s not the end, is it?” Keira challenged. “Because you want some kind of conflict. You want the stakes to be raised.”

“It’s just the best angle,” Elliot told her calmly. “To see if you can come back with your love just as strong.”

Keira had no doubt that a month in Paris wouldn’t break her relationship. It would stay strong, she was certain. What she objected to was the way that Elliot talked about it. Like she was part of an experiment or a story book, rather than a real person with real emotions.

Elliot leaned his arms on the table in a more open stance. “Keira, what does your New York City life look like at the moment? No apartment of your own. Staying at mom’s.”

“How do you know about that?” Keira stammered.

“I have my ways” he said, shrugging.

She remembered the time her mom had called her in Italy to convince her to stay on the magazine. Elliot had prompted that call.

“Have you been speaking to my mom?” she asked suspiciously.

He looked guilty but replied innocently enough. “Mallory and I chat occasionally.”

Keira took a sharp inhalation of breath. Why did her mom feel the need to interfere so much in her life?

“So,” Elliot continued, sweeping it under the carpet. “Really, being in Paris would give you the privacy you need. A whole month just the two of you. No sister in the way, no mom interfering.”

It did sound good, Keira thought. What difference would it make if they embarked on their relationship in New York City or Paris? Other than the fact that here they were crowded with people all eager to meet Cristiano. At least in Paris it would just be them. They’d be anonymous again.

“After this article,” Elliot added. “I might be able to loosen the reins a bit here at Viatorum. Promote you. Then you can pick your own assignments. If this works, and we get the angle right for the Romance Guru, I’ll let you take control of the whole thing. No more last minute postings. No more Antonio’s.”

Keira grimaced as she remembered the first tour guide she’d been paired with in Italy, the pot bellied, cheese-smelling, perpetually-gruff Antonio.

“You really mean that?” she asked. “One more assignment, with Cristiano, and then I’ll be able to set the path for the Romance Guru as I choose to?”

“As long as you’re still going abroad and writing travel articles,” Elliot said, “I don’t care where you do it.”

Keira wanted to test this theory a little. “Australia?” she asked.

“Why not?”

“China?”

“If you so desire.”

“Antarctica?”

“As long as you’re in love while you do it, that’s all I care about. All the readers care about. And who knows, perhaps afterwards we can collect all your pieces and turn them into a book?”

Keira sat back, mulling over the prospect properly for the first time. If she could nail this, things would be significantly easier for her going forward. One more assignment under Elliot’s control then she’d be free-wheeling. And becoming the author of a book was a real draw! She and Cristiano could tour the world together. No more gimmicks about matchmaking or testing love. She could really write their love story.

Besides, things in New York City were a bit strained anyway, with their options either Bryn’s apartment or her old childhood bedroom. There was nothing romantic about either setting. But Paris. Paris! For the first time, she felt a tingle of excitement at the thought of she and Cristiano in the world’s most romantic city. She pictured French windows and billowing lace curtains, kissing under the Eiffel tower, rain splattered sidewalks, croissants in ancient cafes overlooking the Seine, museums, art, culture, architecture. And then a mental picture forced its way into her mind with sudden ferocity: Cristiano down on one knee, a beautiful sparkling ring held out to her.

She hadn’t thought of marriage until Elliot mentioned it. But what if a month in Paris ended with a ring? It certainly couldn’t hurt.

“Okay,” she said, at last. “I’ll do it.”

Chapter Seven

As soon as her meeting with Elliot was over, Keira grabbed her cell phone and hurried outside to call Cristiano. The streets were as busy with traffic and people as they ever were. The thought of leaving it all behind made Keira excited.

She rang his number and after a moment he answered.

“I have some news,” she announced.

“Oh?” he asked. “You’re not pregnant are you?”

“No!” Keira cried, laughing. “We’re going to Paris!”

“We are?” He sounded thrilled.

“Yup. My new assignment. Turns out the readers love you so much they want you to come along. What do you think?”

“I think that’s amazing!” he replied. “I can’t wait. When do we go?”

“Tomorrow.”

She bit her lip, worried about his response. She needn’t have been concerned.

“Wow!” Cristiano cried. “Amazing!”

In the background, she heard the sound of honking horns and ambulance sirens.

“How is your solo tour of New York City going?” she asked him.

“It’s great,” he replied with childish enthusiasm. “I rode the subway to a few different places, walked around some parks. Now I’m besided a place called Teardrop Park.”

Keira was stunned. “You’re right around the corner from my office!”

“I am?” Cristiano asked, surprised.

“Yes! You should come and see me,” she added, thinking of how everyone at the magazine wanted to meet him. “I could introduce you to some people.”

“I’d love that,” he replied.

Keira gave him directions to walk the short distance to where her office was located. Several minutes later, she saw him in the distance rounding the corner. His beauty stunned her, making her heart flutter.

When he reached her, she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him. Then she took his hand and led him inside.

“Guys,” she announced. “This is Cristiano.”

Everyone rushed to meet him. Denise looked like she’d come face to face with a celebrity. Lisa looked like she might faint. For the first time, Keira felt the thrill of being with someone everyone adored, rather than the fear of him being stolen from her.

Elliot came out of his office, sizing Cristiano up with his eyes. He clearly approved of what he saw and came over to shake Cristiano’s hand.

“Has Keira told you the news?” he asked.

“About Paris?” Cristiano replied with a nod. “Yes, and I can’t wait. Thanks so much for arranging for me to go as well. It’s a dream come true to travel the world with the woman I love.”

He hugged Keira tightly against him. Denise and Lisa visibly swooned.

Nina came over next to meet Cristiano. At least she was respectful enough not to drop her jaw to the floor. She just shook his hand cordially. But there was a brightness behind her eyes that made Keira suspicious.

“Did you know that Stella’s coming in today?” she asked Keira.

“Stella the cover designer?” Keira replied. “No. Why?”

Nina’s gaze was focused intently on Cristiano, like she was sizing him up. “I’m just wondering about getting a profile picture of you two. One we can put in the byline.”

Keira frowned. At the moment, it was her face and bio in the byline. She was the writer after all. They were her words, not Cristiano’s.

“I don’t know about that,” she said, sounding a little stilted.

“You’re right,” Nina nodded. “The byline is too small. You two should be the cover stars.”

Elliot started clapping, thrilled by the prospect.

“Wait one minute,” Keira cried, her eyes widening with shock. She looked at Cristiano. “We can’t be on the cover.”

Cristiano clearly wasn’t experiencing the same dread over it as Keira was. He didn’t seem fazed in the slightest by the suggestion.

Nina and Elliot ignored her protests, too busy talking to one another, going over the details, tapping their chins as they looked at Cristiano like he was one of the models Stella hired for her shoots.

“Guys!” Keira cried, trying to get their attention. “We’re not doing it.”

Elliot turned to her at last and frowned. “Your articles are the most popular. It’s why the majority of our readers subscribe to Viatorum.”

He said it simply, like it was nothing more than a logical business decision.

“Nina, maybe we should show her the graph from the market research?” he added.

“I don’t need to see a graph to make my decision,” Keira stammered. “I don’t want to be on the cover, period. I’m not attractive enough. You know there’s a reason some people chose to spend their days hiding behind a laptop!”

“Don’t be silly, Keira!” Cristiano cried. “You’re beautiful. You just don’t see it. Maybe a professional photoshoot would be just the thing to boost your confidence.”

Keira shook her head, stunned, shocked. This couldn’t be happening. This was her nightmare, stepping out from behind the scenes and taking the limelight. She thought of Bryn, the actually beautiful one. She wouldn’t look plain standing next to Cristiano like Keira would.

Just then, the doors opened then and Stella came in, her large black camera case slung over her shoulder. It looked so intimidating to Keira.

Nina waved her over.

“We were just telling Keira and Cristiano about the cover shot,” she said to Stella. “Do you have time to do it today?”

“Absolutely,” Stella said, her gaze fixed on Cristiano approvingly.

Keira felt even worse. He was all anyone wanted to see, not her. She’d just ruin the photos.

“Come on my love,” Cristiano said to her gently. “It’s just a bit of fun. A memory we can look back on. Something to show our parents. And our children, one day.”

Keira couldn’t help but let his gentle cajoling sooth her fears. If Cristiano was thinking of future children then he was at least hoping to be in this for the long haul. Maybe capturing some images of their love while they were young and wrinkle free wasn’t the worst idea in the world.

“What would I have to do?” she asked Stella, relenting just a smidgen.

“It’s France,” Stella said. “So we’re doing a black and white romantic movie theme. Rooftops. Skyline with the Eiffel Tower backdrop. Pretty dress. A romantic kiss.”

“A kiss?” Keira groaned, her anxiety returning.

“But black and white,” Cristiano said, grinning. “Everyone looks perfect in black and white.”

He took her hand and gently tugged her. She let him guide her over to the photoshoot area, where there were bright lights pointing at a large white screen, two similar screens either side to make a sort of three-walled box. There was also a makeup artist there, working on a beautiful model, and a rack of clothes.

“Oh God,” Keira muttered.

Stella went over and spoke to the makeup artist. Their conversation was out of earshot for Keira, but they were both looking at her. Of course she’d need to be made up for the shot, unlike Cristiano who pretty much woke up camera ready.

The artist spoke to the model, who then stood and went over to the couch, looking a bit put out that she’d been interrupted halfway through her makeover. Keira watched her go, looking at her incredible figure and long lean legs. She was so tall, unlike Keira whose height was a little below average.

Stella whisked over and took Keira’s hand.

“Free professional makeover,” Cristiano said, shrugging. “It’s worth it just for that.”

Keira clenched her teeth and allowed Stella to pull her to the makeup chair.

“I won’t need to do much,” the artist told Keira. “This shot is all about looking classic. Black and white movie style. Just some mascara and lipstick really.”

Keira felt no choice but to go along with it. After getting her makeup and hair done, she put on a pretty blue dress of billowing lace.

“It’s too long for me,” Keira said, looking at the piles of fabric by her feet.

“It’s fine,” Stella said. “We’re having you stand on this.”

Keira looked over then and saw that there was a prop chimney top protruding from the prop rooftops. So in this shot they were going to be kissing on the roofs of Paris. It just got more and more intimidating by the moment.

Keira was reunited with Cristiano, who’d been dressed in dark trousers and a striped top, his hair swept to one side in an old movie-star style. He looked stunning, as usual. If there was any good to be taken from his whole ordeal, it was that mental picture of Cristiano!

They stepped onto the set and listened to Stella’s instructions. Keira was to stand on the chimney top, one leg bent, kissing Cristiano.

The whole thing was mortifying for her. She felt so self conscious as she twisted her body into the uncomfortable position, kissing on demand. Cristiano on the other hand seemed to be loving it.

“How are you enjoying this so much?” she asked him.

“I get to kiss you over and over again,” he said. “What’s not to love?”

An audience of admiring women swooned as they watched on. The thought of getting out of New York couldn’t come soon enough for Keira. She wanted everything back to how it had been before, when it was just the two of them, instead of everyone trying to get a piece of Cristiano.

At last, the flashing lights stopped.

“I think we’ve got it,” Stella said.

Cristiano helped her down from the chimney step and they went over to see the digital pictures on Stella’s camera reel.

“Imagine the Paris skyline,” Stella said. “We’re photoshopping that in.”

If Keira hadn’t been in the photo, she’d probably love it. It was romantic, and the chemistry between her and Cristiano was very real. Even though she’d felt nothing but awkward during the whole shot, Stella had somehow managed to capture one perfect moment. But the problem was that it was her in the image. Not just Cristiano, who looked like the French movie star he was portraying.

“Don’t you just love it?” Stella said. “You’ll be celebrities in no time!”

Maybe Cristiano would, Keira thought. He was clearly the star of the shoot, and the star of the article by the sounds of it. What if he found someone better as a result of all this? She couldn’t help wondering what would happen if they broke up. These photos would be a horrible reminder. And awkward, for her to be on the front of a magazine declaring her love with a guy who had left her for someone better.

Elliot took Keira to one side then.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said in my office,” he said. “About this being your life. I think that maybe we’ve given you a schedule that’s been a bit gruelling. Why don’t you take the rest of the day off? There’s no need for you to be in the office and it would be better to have some time to get your ducks in a row, say goodbye to your family, that sort of thing.”

“You’re just worried I’ll get home sick again and want to quit,” Keira said, seeing straight through Elliot’s intentions.

“I just want you to be happy and relaxed,” he said, unconvincingly.

But Keira wasn’t about to argue. She’d had about as much of people swanning around Cristiano as she could handle. She went over to where he was surrounded by a group of writers swooning over the photo, and took him by the arm.

“We have the rest of the day to ourselves,” she told him. “Let’s get out of here.”

“Oh, okay,” Cristiano said, giving in to her gentle tug. He waved at the Viatorum staff. “I guess I’ll see you all another time. Nice to have met you! Bye!”

They watched him all the way out the doors.

As soon as they were outside, Keira took a deep breath. That whole thing had been so stressful, she felt like she needed the rest of the day just to recover.

They headed for the subway. But they’d barely made it down one street before Keira received the first of what was to become a succession of emails, some from Nina, some from Elliot, others from Heather with the Paris itinerary, flight times, boarding pass code, hotel details. So much for having the rest of the day off!

They’d just reached the stairs and were about to head down into the subway when Keira’s phone pinged again, this time with a text message. To Keira’s surprise, it was from Zachary. For one brief second she allowed herself to feel excited that it may be confirmation that he’d returned her money, but those hopes were immediately dashed when she read it.

Hey K. Bad news. My cousin said there’s a ton of renovation work to do on our old apartment so he’s going to have to keep the deposit. Sorry. Let’s go for a drink when I’m back in NYC, ok?

Keira fumed as she read the message. The cheek of it! She was relying on that money to sort out a new apartment and Zach knew it. There was no way they had caused thousands of dollars worth of damage to the apartment; either Zach was lying or his cousin was conning them. Plus the way he so casually told her she wasn’t getting any of it back, like it was just a bit of an inconvenience. And then to ask her out for a drink after!

Irate, Keira typed out a quick, harsh reply.

A drink with you is the last thing I want. Get out of my life.

A moment later, Zachary responded.

You don’t have to be such a bitch about it. Should have known the only thing that mattered to you was the $.

Keira slung her cell phone in her purse, furious.

“What is wrong?” Cristiano asked her, sounding concerned.

“Nothing. Just my bastard of an ex.”

“Zachary?” he asked.

“Yes,” she mumbled.

“Did he do something to hurt you? Do you need me to punch him?”

“God, no!” Keira cried. “I don’t want to talk about him. Or think about him.”

In fact, all she wanted now was to get out of this city – no, this whole goddamn country – and have Cristiano to herself all over again!